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Assalamualaikum~



Woww~ it has been like ages i didn't update my blog.the last post was like 6 months ago?
yeah~ that's how busy i was.*kunun lah busy sangat kaaaaannn*

the reason why i finally back in here is because...
i'm boring of studying.YEAH.LIKE SUPER DUPER BORED.
*padahal nanti exam tataw lah ape je yg aku jawabkan.heh~*
tapi moga-moga baik-baik lah semua nya.
have to face exams when you're in the process of transitioning your age is not that fun.
like you have to 'muhasabah' yourself and in the same time you have to answer exam's questions?
not fun at all.
but i guess,that's how my life is.
full of sacrifices.and bruises(?) *tetibe.haha*

anyhow,please do pray for my friends and me,pretty please?
mari skor kencang-kencang,y'all!amiiinnnn~ :D


And the reason why i'm writing here
*though i don't really wanna write actually since i don't have anything interesing to be shared(?)*,
is because someone asked me what do i want for my birthday?
like,
saya sangat lah tak reti nak mintak-mintak sebenarnya. *ai pemalu kowtttt.kekeke~ :p*
but anyway,
before i present to you my request,
let's read my hiQayat first.. *ecewahh*



It has been almost a year.
yup,since last year.
I've been knocked down to my foot,
real hard.
The last time i remembered of feeling this way is like,
what,
6-7 years ago?

It was hard.
the recovery.
It's not something you wanna embrace when you get older.
The memories
full of bruise.scars.tears

And thank God,
with God's help,i was able to recover
to be a human,
with heart.back.
HAHA. -.-'

And a year ago,
it hit me again.
the pain.the disappointment.
broken.

And it happened when i was trying to draw the path of my future.
trying to rearrange everything in my life.
Suddenly it destroyed the 'budding-to blossom' hope.

And i feel useless.empty.
like a wrenched,full of dirt,old cloth.

i pushed everyone away.
becoming introvert.don't wanna mingle with anyone.
and eventually i pushed YOU too.

Yet you are still here,
being patient
sucking and receiving every tantrums and harsh words and actions i throw towards you.
feeling-less-ly throwing everything away.
ME.

Tak bahagia pun sebenarnya ada hati macam nih.
Yeah,i know it doesn't sound cool or macho,
but just want to remind others,
don't be like me.
cause you will eventually hurt people around you.
and YOURSELF.

Been passing through this kind of life for a year,
there are lots of things that i learned.

Thus,
this is my request~

Please,
do pray for me
that i can become a good woman.
a good daughter,sister,friend
a doctor too,insyaAllah.

And please pray for me,
to have a HEART
an unwavering heart,
a heart that can truly loves,cares and be loyal.
to someone.
to the ONLY ONE.
unconditionally.
that can accept any weaknesses,any flaws,any mistakes
and still be in love with that person.

I know this is cliche,
but i wanna be like everyone else too.
to have a bright, beautiful future.
not a blurred one.

That's all i want for my birthday.

I'm turning 22 years old,
and i want to have a life with a HEART.

ThanQ~ (^_~)

^notametacarpal : Still i wanna thank God for the loves that He showered me,for giving me great family,friends,teachers,surrounding,educations and life.thank you for leading me to this path.make me become ME.Alhamdulillah and thank you. :)

^notametacarpal(2) : I'm coming home right after the final exam.doakan ai skor kencang-kencang,nak naik kapal terbang hati tenang! *winkwink*